Readings: John 20:19-31; Acts 5:27-32 Our reading from John`s Gospel makes it clear that the disciples, even if they had heard the message from Mary Magdalene that she had seen a risen Jesus, either didn`t believe her or were so frightened about suffering the same fate as Jesus, that the significance of what she told them hadn`t been absorbed into their minds. John tells us that Jesus brought a message of peace as well as a commission to carry on the works that he had begun. Almost in anticipation of the Pentecost events they receive from Jesus the gift of the Holy Spirit. But one of their number was missing - we have no idea where Thomas was - but we are told what his reaction was when the other disciples told him that they had seen the Lord. At the Last Supper he had queried the statement made by Jesus that he knew where he was going – according to the account in John`s Gospel he now queries the truth of what the disciples are telling him and demands proof. Eight days later that proof is given to him but it comes with what could be a criticism: `Have you believed because you have seen me? Blessed are those who have not seen and yet believe.` Didn`t you know me well enough to trust what I told you before I died? And, of course, that comment could be addressed not only to Thomas but to all the other disciples, as well as to the generations who have never had the opportunity to seeing Jesus either before his death or after his resurrection. Are we people who say, either openly or secretly `Unless I have proof I won`t believe` or do we as an affirmation of trust echo the words of Thomas which have been described as the earliest Creed: `My Lord and my God`?

I am sure that Thomas has got plenty of friends both within and outside the Church. Do you remember Peter Cundall, well known because of his ABC gardening programme? He was raised a Catholic but for some reason became so disenchanted with the Church that he used to shout `parasite` at the local Catholic priest, and now calls himself an atheist. When invited to consider the wonders of nature by looking at a beautiful flower his response was that for every beautiful flower where were `a million bloomin` aphids` eating them.

Perhaps there was a time when the majority of people in the western world believed in the resurrection but my guess is that the doubters now outnumber the believers. Lots of reasons can be given for the rise of doubt - the obscenity of Christians going to war against one another; the extremism of some religions with many people now claiming that religion is one of the great curses of the world; others preferring the opportunities, the pleasures and the values of the world to the teaching of Jesus, and yet others simply finding it impossible to believe that there is life after death either for Jesus or for anyone else.

But what about within the Church? People who believe in the literal accuracy of the Bible find there all the proof they need. They are not troubled by the variety of the accounts or by questions such as why the two followers of Jesus on the road to Emmaus didn`t recognize Jesus. For people who have no difficulty with the Biblical records there is no mystery about the resurrection of Jesus - it says that it happened, therefore it did happen. But for those who do not accept such a view of the Bible belief in the resurrection becomes a matter of trust rather than of proof - and because that is the case there is always the possibility of doubt. Some of the people regarded as being outstanding Christians - people like Martin Luther or Mother Teresa or John Knox, in spite of their very high profiles as Church leaders, were often possessed by doubts about whether their trust in God was misplaced.

In respect to the issue of faith vs doubt I can only speak for myself - First of all I find myself in harmony with St Bernard who said,The poet Tennyson wrote `There lives more honest faith in doubt, believe me, than in half the creeds`.

I have no doubt that following the death of Jesus on a cross something of enormous importance followed - so great that it not only turned cowards into heroes but also inspired them to want to share everything they owned and to deal with one another according to need rather than greed. What form that death defying appearance took remains for me a mystery - so intangible that Jesus could pass through locked doors? - so tangible that he could share a meal with the disciples who had returned to their fishing occupations? - so mysterious that he could walk with disciples and not be recognized? - so powerful that his message could break down racial barriers and lead to a new world order? The answers to events like these do not constitute proof of the resurrection but they do lead only to three possibilities - a widely held hysterical delusion, a carefully constructed conspiracy or a mystery which goes beyond our comprehension but which can create a deep sense of joy and hope. `I believe though I do not comprehend, and I hold by faith what I cannot grasp with my mind`

In spite of the fact that doubt exists both outside and within the Church I think that there are many who still have the hope that the Easter events are more than mere legends. In terms of the possibility of life beyond death this hope has been expressed in a very wide variety of ways - the idea that there is `pie in the sky when you die` may not mean much to people like ourselves who have more than our fair share of pie now, but for those who have known hunger, cruelty, tragedy, disappointment and injustice what keeps them going is the hope that something better lies beyond this life. Many of the negro gospel songs reflect that hope which, granted their hardships as slaves is pretty understandable. A few weeks ago in Songs of Praise a group of black people sang, if not these words, then some very similar:-

There`s a crown laid up in glory,
There`s a robe for all to wear,
And we never need be sorry
That we did life`s troubles share;
For our crown will shine the brighter
For the battles we have won,
And our robes will be the whiter
When our trav`ling days are done.

And there is a chorus: Happy home, happy home, Nevermore from Christ to roam!When our fighting here is over, And our vict`ries all are won, There`s a mansion up in glory, When our trav`ling days are done.

There are others who found in the resurrection of Jesus the ability to face death with a calm and accepting spirit - I think that spirit applied to many if not all of the apostles and disciples but also in our time as well. I have just finished reading a biography of Dietrich Bonhoeffer - many will know that he was executed on the orders of Hiltler just 23 days before the end of the Second World War. He could have escaped his fate on a number of occasions but felt very deeply that God was calling him, for the sake of the gospel, to face the consequences of his opposition to all that Hitler stood for. In August 1941 in a circular letter to the Confessing Churches he wrote `In life with Jesus Christ, death as a general fate approaching us is confronted by death from within, one`s own death, the free death of daily dying with Jesus Christ. Those who live with Christ die daily to their own will. Christ in us gives us over to death so that he can live within us. Thus our inner dying grows to meet that death from without. Christians receive their own death in this way, and in this way our physical death very truly becomes not the end but rather the fulfilment of our life with Jesus Christ. Here we enter into community with the One who at his own death was able to say `It is finished`. Just before he died he wrote that death is `the gateway to our homeland, the tabernacle of joy, the everlasting kingdom of peace` and the prison doctor who witnessed his execution later wrote `in the almost 50 years that I have worked as a doctor I have never seen a man so entirely submissive to the will of God`

Some of the thoughts represented in this address have been generated by reading the biography of Dietrich Bonhoeffer, a massive book Out of the Silence about the attempts in 1922, 1923 and 1924 to climb Everest, mainly by men who had survived the First World War and who had seen death on such a massive scale that they no longer had any fear of personal death, and by a re-reading of A Matter of life and death by Neville Watson.

I think that I can in all honesty summarise my faith in the continual spiritual presence of Jesus by repeating the words already quoted `I believe though I do not comprehend, and I hold by faith what I cannot grasp with my mind`.